my friend B - the one who Daughter talked to in the last post - her band was playing last night
it was a three band line-up of weird artsy bands - two local, one touring
B plays in an experimental techno/ambient band
anyway - daughter wanted to go. it was ostensibly an all ages gig. it was at a local club - an actual club - members sign-in and all. there are different liquor laws here for private member clubs than for regular liquor licenses. the most notable is that in private clubs - which are often cultural (German, Austrian, Romanian, Ukrainian [2 of them], Caribbean, etc) - retail liquor can be sold in the presence of minors accompanied by parents. it can also happen in restaurants with food purchases, but not lounges - or straight beverage rooms. blah, blah, blah
this venue is a "cultural club" that is an "arts and culture" club (not ethnic) that is dedicated to bringing in live music and experimental arts performances.
bottom line - daughter legally got to go to the bar (with me) at age 12...
and see live bands
and dance in a club on a dance floor (such as there is there - it's a big room in an old converted warehouse)
you know - the artsy/college-lots-of-women-dancing-by-themselves-all-artsy-like scene
many a white dude with dreadlocks, many a peasant skirt and torn jeans worn over leggings, and big bangley jewelry and scarves and such
a lot of people taking trips outside and coming back in smelling a little "odd"
surprise - we ran into the guy that niece M (mentioned in last post and others) used to live with. who just got back from Hawaii from travelling with niece M and the others... he's a white guy with dreadlocks, um, mellow dude so he was pleased to see us and friendly. he didn't have any issues from the break-up.
i knew a lot of the young people there. i was surprised. but i guess i do hang out with that sort of crowd on the periphery - having been inside of it (no dreads, though) when i was younger, and still knowing and being involved with artsy/lefty/granola crunching types now.
i've never fit completely well into the crowd - i was a little too red meat eating, and a little too realistic and goal oriented (and not snottily pretentious) for those folks (in my time [and now])- and these young people.
also, some of them used to work for me (or were in teams led/directed by me), or for my peer group before the election - some others who weren't in government still work for friends of mine
daughter was pleased as punch. felt right at home. drank her Dr. Pepper. stayed close, but talked to all the people who came by to say hi. i think many were surprised to see me there, and i think just came over to check out why i was there - they seemed genuinely happy to see me - but still curious
friend B was thrilled we came to visit - met her dad there as well
daughter said as we were on our way there "you know - this is the first band, or concert like this i will have ever been to see" - not quite true, but she was 4 or 5 years old for the last one...
she was buzzed
it's where she wants to be
the culture she wants to be a part of
she has said before, and said it again last night
that she wants to leave behind the "goody-two-shoes" pleaser personality that she adopted to curry favour with her mother, aunt, grandmother, and teachers
she says she feels she hid her true self
we'll see whom this young woman is and becomes
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4 comments:
Mr. C. . . . she will be a great young woman . . . . . she will have your love and support. . . . if she has that. . . . there is no stopping her.
I would hope I could react and love like you have done.
You never pat yourself on the back. Do it now.
Ciao
Cad, your daughter will be just fine. She has you in her corner.
You're a terrific parent.
xoxo
Kudos to you for being a great daddy!!
If she has you there to guide I have a feeling who she becomes will absolutely totally blow you away with pride and honour that she is your daughter.. and that you helped create ( MAJORITY) an amazing young person.
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