paying off credit cards

my Dad lent me $2000 this month, and we project will lend me $2000 next month until my employment insurance kicks in

Dad just offered to pay about $25,000 of my credit cards out of their home equity line of credit - this will save me the better part of $400 per month in interest and take away those monthly payments

but Mom is a little edgy about it

it's not my plan - it's Dad's - but i can't argue with the logic

so now i am going over there to discuss things

i am not thrilled

i'm not ready for this kind of an event emotionally

i've been working through opening up some of the issues from my childhood surrounding the constant violence i suffered through grade school. i don't know if i've talked about it before - but i was beaten up on pretty much a daily basis at school - it was a daily (sometimes more than once a day) game to the kids to see who could whack my nose to make it bleed

add that to my brother's consistent violence (he liked to kneel on my arms and sit on my chest and slap my face for the couple of hours before my parents came home from work) and ridicule

add that to opening the box that all that had been stuffed into - and looking at the situation with different eyes - thinking about the fact my parents didn't defend me

didn't move me to a different school

insisted that i not physically fight or physically defend myself

a pacifist response was demanded

but they didn't go to the school and demand action from the teachers

who told me they couldn't do anything to the kids (and you may recall me discussing that the priest at our catholic school had told the other kids to rough me up because of my Dad's politics)

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i'm not really emotionally up to this meeting

but i'm leaving now