arts and culture weekend

there was still some tension on friday night. we dealt with some stuff in our respective lives - Smitten laundry and housecleaning, and me - helping my Dad with his computer over at the University where his research office is for the book they are sponsoring for him to write. it's based on his master's thesis (Dad just completed his masters degree a couple of years ago when he was about 77 years old).

i was tense about stuff at work, about helping my Dad - he can be kind of needy and can use up as much space as i give him to use up...

Smitten needed the time to just make a break from things in her workplace, and i think she dropped by her Dad's place. She also wanted to put her house in order.

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With public health being what it is here, we have an extensive home care set-up. Some is publicly funded through the health system and some is not. In the week in between the first email in the last post ("I was not asking for you to fix this for me.") and the second(" Especially that you gave me an offer, and not a solution."), Smitten father was released from hospital. But before he was released he was required to have a home care assessment and plan worked out. Under public health here, if you are incapable of properly looking after yourself completely, the hospital workers (and staff social workers) can refuse to discharge you until you have adequate care arranged.

That was imposed. Her father is receiving home care for health, hygiene, and medication (make sure they take it on time). You see it costs the public health care system less to send nurses around to look after people in their own homes, bathe them, and give them their medication than it costs to have them in an institutional setting. It also allows a person more dignity to remain in their home and retain a level of independence.

Cleaning his apartment will be a separate and private arrangement the he and Smitten may choose at some point.

This is the point where i say: I was right. My assessment of the situation was bang on. Even to the point of Smitten's worry and stress being reduced. For the record, I didn't say anything to her or even imply it to her, though. When she told me that this was being ordered by the health region/public health I just said "Good - that will alleviate some worry for you."

I did ask her if she wanted the list of private providers i had already obtained and explained the structure of the care that was and was not provided through the public system. She said yes, and i gave it to her.

We have not returned to the issues of our disagreement at all. She discusses her Dad's situation and i listen. I work really hard at having no ideas on this subject.

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Why do i mention "I was right"? Because. Because I was right. I hate getting shit for being right. I need to say I was right to affirm that I am a capable human being and that i was not wrong. I was wrong for a lot of years. Even when i was right i was still wrong.

i need to affirm (to myself at least) that i am not a useless clod who gets things wrong at every turn.

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Friday night she came over later and we spent some time, but went to sleep early. It is good to sleep with her. I am pleased that she finds comfort in my presence. It was one of her desires - to sleep together. Her ex-husband was a stay up after she went to bed and watch TV guy. She missed the warmth of a partner next to her.

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Saturday was a late start and some running around doing a few errands. Doing a little bit of shopping. We ended up in an east Indian clothing shop that is new in out city. that was pretty funky. Smitten loved the jewelery and stuff. This shop already provides for many of the belly dancers in our region. They can also send to India to have clothes made. There is an village that the proprietor is hooked into that produces textiles and clothes. Some kind of co-op/collective thing (which is good - not as much fear of exploiting poor people in India). I discovered I can get a silk suit custom tailored and shipped here for around Cdn $400. [heh!]

That evening (last night) we went to a chamber orchestra performance i had bought tickets for. Son needed to attend a concert for his band class, and I had proposed he could come with us as well. He would have gone to a concert last week, except last Saturday was the belly dance year end concert - for some reason son didn't want to miss that when i asked him if he wanted to go...

anyway, the concert was quite nice. we dropped son off at home and i went to my place to change. Smitten had dressed up, and i had stayed in regular clothes. I was a little embarrassed because i really should have just dressed up for the fun of it. i have gotten so far away from dressing in stuff other than jeans and regular clothes that i forgot/forget to take the time to look snazzy.

Smitten was absolutely stunning. she was just bowl me over hot last night.

i wanted to go out after 0 she was a little tired, but said we would go for a drink.

we went to a local martini bar - a hip place - techno dance music, good decor. had a couple of drinks

tennessee citrus

2 parts Jack Daniels
1.5 parts Amaretto
A splash of Vodka
1 part Lime juice
Lime


chill your martini glass.
mix two parts whiskey, one+onehalf parts amaretto, optionally a splash of (citrusy, if you like) vodka and one part fresh (ideally pulpy) lime juice in your shaker over ice.
get out your martini glass.
pour into the glass and garnish with freshly cut slices(s) of lime.

a couple of others i can find recipes for just now - will share later

we had a good time. we ended up staying for about 3 hours - she discover3ed she wasn't tired anymore. went back my place and didn't get to sleep until after 4am...

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got to go now - need to go exercise. we are attending a film launch tonight. one of Smitten's friends has done a graduate film about belly dance and it is premiering tonight. we are attending