(yes, i'm still convincing myself of the need to leave Mrs_C)
Just a quick note on more ridiculous moments. More on this weekend in later posts.
So apparently I was having an affair with a lesbian woman who worked in our office last year. And her partner. At the same time. Other than the idea that a committed multi-year lesbian couple having an affair with me being just some really dumb assed shit, I dunno. Of course Mrs_C couldn't actually tell me a time when she didn't really know where I was exactly... you know - when I might have actually had the opportunity to have this affair.
She just had visions of it. Or some fucking thing.
I got really mad and told her that if she was going to accuse me of something she had better bloody well make sure it was logistically possible before saying it. And that i wouldn't mind if her delusions actually had any remote possibility of possibility.
Yep. Then last night I went to my parents place to fix my Dad's computer. It ran about an hour and a half longer than I projected when I left, but I had said that I wouldn't know until I started working on it. I called twice from my parents phone while working to give an update (we were going to watch a movie when I arrived home). there is call display on our home phone so she knew where i called from.
When I came home she told me she thought I was with another woman and that's why I took so long.
Aaaaargh!!!
I told her to phone my parents and ask them. She wouldn't. I asked why she didn't phone over and see where I was while she was thinking this shit up.
She said something to the effect of she didn't really believe it but she was afraid I might be having an affair. I returned to the "WHEN" question.
She then asked me where I really was the night she was out of town with the kids and I was having dinner with my parents. I told her having dinner with my parents.
I also suggested she call again. She wouldn't.
She's nice to me a fair bit of the time, but then there are these whacked out episodes.
As I mentioned previously, Stockholm Syndrome is alive and well in my person. I know why I love(d) her, and why I like her often times, but also why I am moving inexorably toward divorce.
“All I want is for the baby to be healthy!”
8 months ago
7 comments:
Is she on any medications like anti-depressants or anti-psychosis meds? Just curious, what RX medication does she take, if any?
CP.
It's called paranoia.
I'm with CP on this one...to an extent. I don't think lack of medication and productive counseling are reasons to put up with this emotional abuse.
I also think the fact that you've made so many positive strides in life during the past year make her feel threatened in her role as the Controller in your marriage and family.
Think about it this way: Did your kids hear her accusations about infidelity?
They're listening.
she doesn't take any medication. she has this purity thing against even taking headache medication - "The way to get rid of a headache is to work it off!"
----
unless the drinking counts
you know every couple of days, one or two drinks (usually a little stiff - 1 to 2 oz). at 135lbs 2 drinks puts her over legal limit... and brings welling up all those uncontrolled emotions
----
yeah
the kids have heard it
she's often discreet, sometimes not...
i think buddha girl hit the nail on the head -- your wife is threatened by you taking control of your life.
doesn't help you deal with her, but it's interesting.
oy.
sounds like she's giving you plenty of material to help you see exactly why you need to end this thing.
Cadbury, You have simply grown. Emotionally, intellectually, and physically. You know who you are, what you need, and you have a great outlook on life as well as great character. She, on the other hand does not have these attributes. The only way she can compete is by knocking you down. Trying to hit below the belt. It is lame. Your wonderful children know it....and deep down I know you do too. It is sad, but accusing you of stuid crap is all she has. I am with BG and BG's Lil Sis on this one as well! Good words!
I know you are on the right road now....excelerate.
Sending you well wishes and strength, OHC
I agree with what everyone else has said....
I think she needs to get on medication. Seriously. Not to save the marriage, but to save herself. This woman is in a spiral of despair. She is watching you grow while she remains stagnant. I wish there was a way you could reach out to her about getting some help, some psychological help, without her freaking out.
CP.
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