This is getting beyond stupid

(originally wrtten Thursday May 11 around 5pm)

So on Sunday night (May 7) I went to drop off my son's friend, wash my vehicle, and pick up a movie. This activity set had "pre-approval".

As I was on my way out the door I noticed we were short of coffee - Mrs_C was down in the basement and I had my shoes on so i didn't feel like taking them off, going down and telling her then - going to Starbucks for coffee is about a 20 minute round trip from our place.

There was nothing on the agenda. We were doing household maintenance in our own duty areas and I had finished all my stuff. Mrs_C was doing laundry.

I dropped of the son's friend, got coffee, washed my vehicle, and picked up a movie.

63 Minutes.

I got home and Mrs_C lit into me for having been gone for so long. I explained that I was gone for 25 minutes longer (traffic lights) because I had picked up coffee.

Not good enough. This triggered a litany of accusations of how I am inconsiderate of Mrs_C. I apologised for not advising her of my plan to get coffee. Not good enough.

I could describe the details of the scourge, but will spare you. I had no idea that being gone somewhere for 25 extra minutes would be that level of slight/affront.

When going to get coffee became an example of me going out and having fun, and she started describing the entire trip as "taking 1 hour just to get a movie" was when i said i had had it (see previous post) and that all that was left was the logistics of a split.

Well that went off into an entirely different direction and discussion. I had resolved to carry through to the end with the split. But, by 3am we had resolved to keep trying and not to complete the split. I still don't know how I arrived at that conclusion because I had resolved to stay firm on leaving.

I guess I'm weak as well as inconsiderate (said with a wry smile [not a sympathy line, by the way]).

----

Monday (May 8) was OK...

Tuesday was the waking me up by yelling morning (see previous post). That day Mrs_C agreed to go for counselling.

That day after work we had a bit of a discussion (only an hour or so - i had to go back to work to finish some stuff i hadn't gotten done because of my desire to throw up all day). During the discussion when she asked me "Why would you say you were leaving. We agreed not to hurt each other like that." I said that she had gone too far to an extreme and that I thought we were back to a scenario like last year when it was just constant criticism of me. I said I meant it (leaving), but backed off at the moment the was a glimmer of hope. Blah, blah, blah. Things were moderate and I went to work, and came home 11:30pm - we had tea when I came home.

Wednesday: I started to describe something bad that happened on Wednesday but don't even remember now what happened (May 15). More of the same shit.