my children told me last night that their mother had said to them at one time that she thought that daughter was being raped at my apartment
by son's friends, and then later intimated that it was occurring from son
and then later intimated that it was occurring from me
but backed off immediately when both kids turned on her very hard
i'm told her standard practice is to launch some wild and outlandish accusation or bizarre statement of fear and then when the kids rip into her for her bullshit, she runs off to her room crying
literally
she's nuts
she's actually bonkers
i think
----
i need to figure out what to do. i am loathe to allow my children around that sort of behaviour, but i am equally loathe to try to lever them out of their mother's house without their consent.
----
she has so little impulse control
it's pathetic
she just blurts out whatever floats into her head
whatever bizarre imagining or construct developed out of her own past or warped sense of the universe
“All I want is for the baby to be healthy!”
8 months ago
7 comments:
Are you finally seeing the light Mr. C. . . . she is scarey to me.
I would always be worried that she'd take herself out and the kids too!
Ciao
*sigh*....Cad....I've said since the very beginning of all this that I thought she was insane....or at the very least....extremely disturbed and in need of serious help.
Please get your kids away from her.
I wonder if they might want you to lever them out of her control without her consent. They tell you these sorts of things consistently, right? Do they expect you to do something about them or just listen to them?
Look at it this way. They love their mother but are seriously conflicted by her actions which they can't stand. They don't know how to choose against her because they know she would be hurt. If you make the decision for them, they are relieved of the stress but it's not their fault.
I wonder if that might not be what they are hoping for.
Also... if you want their consent, rather than asking for it directly, why not make your decision and tell them what you have pretty much decided to do. Casually ask how they feel about it before you take action.
In this way you are asking for their consent without directly making them agree to the action, thereby relieving them of the blame for it. They can say outright "no, we want to stay with mom" or they can say reluctantly "I will miss mom, but maybe you're right and she isn't up to being a mother right now." or something similar... if they disagree with you directly, as long as you ask how they feel about something before taking action, they have the ability to stop it if they choose to.
My gut feeling is... I think you need to take action (and I think that you know this), but I think you need to try to get their 'permission' without making them clearly choose against her. That might be too hard for them.
They need you now more than ever to continue to be the parent..I agree with ALL of what Lara has said. Seems like they are asking you for help by sharing all that they do.
Hang in there buddy, it's tough to just read about it, so I'm certain going through it first hand is horrible...you're doing a great job.
lots of love,
lil'sis
Sometimes I don't think we need our children's 'permission' to do our job as parents. They may not like it, but it's not up to them, really. Their home life with mom is not safe.
I'd start by reporting it to your attorney, making sure its documented.
It also sounds like she may be trying to justify your daughters sexuality by 'blaming' it on a horrendous, dirty act.
I'm scared for your kids, Cad.
Report it.
W.
on some level u once loved that woman.. that being said.. if I were you Cad.. get the kids out of there.. you could single parent them fine I bet.. they are in a abusive situation with that woman.. she is ill.. very ill..
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