desperation and the shattering of delusion

Son stayed with me. Daughter stayed at her Mom's. Daughter told me friday night that she wanted to stay with her Mom full-time. I refused to budge on the issue. By the end of that discussion I let daughter stay that night, and son came with me. Daughter was fully huggy and back to normal after I laid down the law - no agreement to change custody. I think she was happy, even if she had jusr said she wanted to stay full-time with her Mom. I would pick up daughter after Mrs_C and I discussed parenting issues at 11 am. Daughter seemed way to happy and huggy. I suspect Mrs_C influence on daughter's request.

Took son to my parents to do some work in the morning.

I went to talk over parenting issues. We decided to go for a walk instead of going for a coffee (Mrs_C's suggestion [should have been my first clue something would go weird]). We walked around the neighbourhood. We talked parenting. Mrs_C kept trying to steer things toward the marriage and our relationship. I kept refusing to discuss those issues.

I used Balloon Pirate's lines - they worked well. Thanks.

She suggested we go sit in the back yard. We did.

We sorted out the parenting issues.

However it occured, it slipped to relationship issues. I told her again that it was never going to lead to a reconciliation. She tried to argue, she tried to plead, she tried to bully. I stayed firm. She did the crying thing. I made motions to get daughter and leave.

She says "I'm so horny. Let's have sex."

"No. That won't work" I go to get up from my chair and she is literally on top of me with her shirt up and her breasts out. Now, remember - we're outside. We're in the back yard. She's climbing on top of me on the chair pushing her now exposed breasts in my face and has wrapped her arms around my head. She saying things like "I want you to fuck me now. Come upstairs and take me" and such.

I'm all "WHAT THE FUCK" as I'm trying to get up from my chair and she's on top of me doing her thing trying to kiss me and grind on me.

I extricate myself and hastily flee to the garage to get my daughter from inside (attached garage - entrance to house from backyard).

Mrs_C comes after me and manages to get up on the steps inside between me and the door. She starts taking off her clothes.

I am completely off balance by this point. I'm telling her "no, i can't and i won't" but she's pushing it like a wild woman.

i think i can hear daughter coming from inside and tell mrs_c that.

i should have probably just left and come back later, but i was getting daughter. i was hell bent on that.

Mrs_C puts her top back on and pulls up her pants.

I push past and go inside to get daughter.

She grabs my keys and goes upstairs. I want my keys. I'm rattled. In hindsight I shouldn't have gone after her, but i want out of here.

She goes to her room. I go to get my keys. She's taking off her clothes again, and is stripped in seconds. I'm getting my keys. She trying to grab me an hold me and kiss me and undo my pants and lifting up my shirt saying all sorts of "fuck me deep and hard" stuff that's has never come out of her mouth before.

I'm trying to get away - she's hanging on - literally. I'm just fucked up. My naked ex-wife is hanging on the my arms and legs and torso and I'm struggling to get away without hurting her, my daughter is in the basement rec-room watching TV.

So I tell her "Stop!"

"We can't do this."

"Why? I'm soooooo horny. It's just sex."

"We've done that before, and it didn't work. Remember?"

"I don't care"

"I'm seeing someone else. I've been with someone else. I can't. I can't sleep with you."

[silence]

[she lets go]

She looks at me. She says "I don't care. I forgive you." and starts at my belt again.

"NO!!!"

She backs off and looks at me. "I've got to go" I say.

She starts getting dressed. I wait. I don't want to have the possibility of an incident with daughter in the house. She is telling me how it is an afront to God and that I have now committed adultery and all this stuff.

She says that she should have had more self respect for herself than to do what she did and to keep trying after I told her I was with someone else. She starts asking things liek "Is she hot?" I tell her we're not going anywhere there on this discussion.

I go call daughter.

Mrs_C makes a number of snarky comments about her presumptions of my new sex life. She actually apologises for making them, and says "I know they are snarky, but I'm allowed to make them, given the circumstances."

I tell her to make sure she tells the whole story of what went on that morning to her sister, instead of just the part about me telling her i slept with someone else.

She says "well, i guess this really is it, isn't it? I had always hoped for a reconcilliation." then "have a nice life". she went into the backyard to cry. i follow and say "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to ever have to tell you in these kinds of circumstances."

I load stuff in the vehicle and leave with daughter.

[the above is an abridged but accurate representation of the events and words]

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things went well with the kids and with daughter. today has been a beautiful time together. more on that later.

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blog_surfer: this post is going to be ripe territory for your shit. don't bother. anything you post will be deleted summarily.

this is a pre-emptive fuck-off