Sunday, September 24, 2006

Perfect

That's what it was

Perfect.

That's what she is

Perfect

wow

Smitten went back to bed for a snooze just now. I'm blogging and clearing up all the dishes and stuff.

I spent a little too long blogging and researching psychological triggers yesterday, so my preparation was about 30 minutes behind schedule, so that didn't make me completely happy. But given that we had no truly defined timeline for supper it didn't matter.

I figured it was better for the evening for me to become more self-aware and to get past the panic/anxiety attacks I was having all day yesterday as I relived things while blogging and researching. So I put that in front of preparation. (i actually had to shower later in the evening to get rid of the sweat and oily feeling i had from the anxiety attacks)

We drank wine and listened to music.

I cooked.

The table was wonderful. I took a picture of my pre-date setup but forgot to take one with the food on it.

Oh, well.

The meal was perhaps the best meal I've ever had.

No - really

I've eaten a lot of places around the world and this was topnotch from a flavour and preparation standpoint. I am awesome.

Dim sum - shrimp, pork in wrapper, and little pork dumplings

hoisin/sesame/peanut dip and Schezuan hot oil with crispy chilis still in it

msot of the meal was Schezuan based

Mushrooms - several varieties of chinese mushrooms and fungus - highly flavourful with appropriate bizarre textures - ginger/garlic/hot oil/soy/hoisin

Spicy hot eggplant with onion, green onions, and parsely - cooked with sherry and soy

Broiled salmon - small pieces with skin on one side served on a plate with spicy stir fried green beans cooked with whole red chilis and cashews

It was really good.

She was blown away by the effort and preparation and the food itself

I was on top of the world.

we talked, and listened to music, and shared

we touched and kissed

we showed each other more pictures from our lives

I showed her my collection of boat/sailing magazines and the websites i frequent to pay homage to my fantasies about sailing/cruising

She wasn't derisive of my fantasy like Mrs_C. she had no idea of mrs_c's reaction. Smitten was all over the fantasy. I shared my ideas of how I could actually make it happen. How I could spend a year tooling around the Caribbean and another year tooling around the Mediterranean. I've researched it. Painstakingly - for about 3 and a half years. That was the fantasy of freedom that helped me through a lot of rough spots with my fibromyalgia.

she loves the idea of learning to sail.

She discovered my Joe Satriani CDs. She was so happy. She has never met anyone else that likes Joe Satriani before. We even have the same favourite song of his. That has some SUPER significance to Smitten that I still do not know. She was really happy.

Grand marnier and snifters, incense and dancing, music and laughter.

It was a wonderful evening and night. And as far as yesterday's up and down disfunctions... for the most part everything worked for me fully all the way through last night (for about 5 hours). You can imagine I am pretty happy about that.

I think it will be a matter of practice and erasing some old pathways and I will be OK. Even with occasional issues and triggers affecting me I'm still good, and Smitten is very understanding and willing to vary activity to accommodate me.

I made her Japanese green tea and coffee this morning and we lounged about in the nude. We talked and she read more of my sailing magazines.

Now she's sleeping again. I guess I kept her awake too long [heh].

Laundry calls - talk to you later

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

i'm so glad you had such a wonderful evening. and are still having a wonderful day today. (and i am jealous!)

one caveat: no one is perfect. don't get too hung up in the perfect game... it can backfire...

still.. yay, you!

Big Pissy said...

Woo Hoo!!!!!

I'm so happy to hear it went so well!

cadbury_vw said...

i hear you terry

and i understand what you are saying

and thank-you for helping hang on to the kite string and keeping me anchored

----

i should elaborate on "perfect"

she meets fully and completely (so far) all the criteria that i set out for the person i was looking for

we will see how things progress

there are things about her and her background that i consider sub-optimal from an ideal scenario.

but nothing that is any kind of a deal breaker

eg: i would have normally preferred someone with a family grouping around them. her mother is dead. her father is an old guy in an apartment on a pension watching TV and smoking cigarettes. she takes care of him on a bi-weekly basis and makes sure his place doesn't get too ratty

from a cold or abstract perspective, sub-optimal.

but i'm not looking for true perfection. just for someone who is kind and caring (and gorgeous, and funny, and uses language well, and likes science fiction, and monty python, and wants as much laughter and joy as they can stand. and likes asian food, can handle themselves in "posh" social settings, isn't afraid of a wrench, likes kids (has kids), and likes some of the same music as me. doesn't have a bunch of sexual hang-ups, likes to kiss, and accepts kindness and special things [and thinks i'm sexy]) among other things...

i'm an 80% guy. if something hits 80% or higher, i'm pretty much good with it. that's perfect for me.

southern peach said...

Glad it went well Cadbury!!! I agree with Terry...I'm jealous with a capial J! he he You deserve the happiness and great company that Smitten is providing :)

Anonymous said...

hey, i hear ya. she sounds fabulous, truly.

i just think we often get into trouble with our criteria, though to a certain degree, we all have a list.

i'm happy you're enjoying your time with her. you SO deserve it...!

CP said...

Oy, Joe Satriani. I just downloaded his ENTIRE discography the other night. 20 albums. Fav song? The Crush of Love. LOVE him.

Anyway, I have to concur with Terry. It's VERY early on. Every relationship has that honeymoon phase. What starts as Smitten...end up Mrs. C., so just be careful not to put all your eggs into one basket. She is NOT perfect, albeit perfect for you...for now. If you set the bar that high, her first mistake...and she will drop from a very high pedastal, and that's not fair to do to anyone.

Everyone else is going to shine in comparison to what you have gone through for the past few years. Don't become love blind. Keep your eyes open. The flaws in Smitten are there, you just aren't seeing them yet. If you see them and THEN decide you are still happy...then you are being realistic with yourself and her.

I am glad to see you are LIVING finally. Enjoy every second.

CP.