"she'll just drag it out..."
- Big Pissy, September 05, 2006
"I'd lean to the manipulation side of things on the dental side, but I'd make sure she gets it done quickly, the appointment set, give it a deadline or something to show you mean it."
- bg's Little Sis, September 07, 2006
Went to meet the teacher night for Daughter. Mrs_C phoned last night to tell me to be there (she got the memo [see: impetus for online family calendar]). She thought "We should show a united front."
I agree. Not my wording, but we should show unity or, uh, jointness... as parents in this situation in dealings with the school.
The teacher was thrilled to meet us (Daughter has already impressed the teacher [like she has every year]with her scintillating self, extreme verbosity [quality verbiage], and keener to please personality). I did my usual volunteer to teach/help with computer and internet stuff. I also volunteered to use my connections to get members of the legislative assembly out to the school for their social studies section on governance, and to provide any additional materials needed.
Walked to the house with Mrs_C afterwards, she asks me to come in to discuss a couple of parenting issues - sleep/bedtime schedule and exercise/activity planning for the kids. I'm wary, but agree. I put a time limit on it saying I need to go work out.
We talk - it's all business.
This is where she lobs out of nowhere (as part of a reference to dealing with the school) "Well, I wanted to show that we weren't fractionated and hating each other - you know in some families there's drinking and violence and abuse - but I wanted them to see that we're just people, even if we're split [editor's note: so far so good, right?]- because who knows how long we'll stay split - or whatever may happen in the future..."
Not biting, I replied "That's why the online calendar is so important - to allow us to manage our parenting roles even while we are in separate households."
I stood up and left. She grabs me and hugs me as I'm leaving. Then kisses me full on the mouth - I pull back and make stuttery hasty noises and motions to leave.
And I leave. Quickly.
“All I want is for the baby to be healthy!”
1 year ago
3 comments:
Mr.C. . . Wow. . . be careful. . . the rejection. . . or perceived rejection by you. . . . her next move . . . can be revenge. . . she will say you hit her. . . call cops. . . and you my friend. . . will be in jail . . . with domestic violence charges. . . and a restraining order.
It happened to my brother. . . he did not hit her. . . she hit him. . . cops don't care . . . the accusation is enough. . .but it was a sure way for him to realize how cunning she is.
Ciao
Ciao
You are a fool for putting yourself into the situation.
A separation is not a divirce. It can lead to a divorce, but it does not need to lead to one. You are married to this woman whether you want to be or not.
She is clearly showing you she still has loving emotions towards you, and you reject her coldly? You need to say, and mean it, you do not love her anymore. If you cannot, divorce is not the option.
You still have a foot in two boats. Pick one or the other, and then act like you made a decision.
Walking home with her? Idiot! Sitting down and talking? You claim you cannot do that anymore. So why continue to do it?
Next school function. Drive there. Drive home. Other discussions can be emailed or a mutually agreed phone call. Make custody exchanges a silent time. No chit-chat.
If you keep up trying to look like a nice guy, you will not be thought of as one. You'll be thought of as an idiot who has no idea what he wants. Be a role model for your kids. Know what you want in life. Then they can set goals for themselves, too.
Calling you an idiot is not insulting you. It is showing you what you are doing is wrong. You are intelligent, but you are not showing it here. Stop being an idiot.
Could I say it sweet and nice? sure, but you'll think you'll win me over with how gentle you are trying to treat the matter. Sorry, it never works that way.
You are a great father, Cad.
Keep it up! :)
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